Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Big Brother Recap: Week 1

Not even halfway through the first episode, Julie Chen tells us that one of the house guests will be going home before the night is over, so that puts everyone on their best behavior during the FIRST COMPETITION OF THE SEASON!

"BUT FIRST" the 4 coaches (Britney, Boogie, Dan, and Janelle) must pick their teams. Dan, Boogie, and Janelle have a feeling Willie is related to the evil Russell from Survivor, so they refuse to pick him for their team. Poor Brit Brit has no idea and picks him as her first choice.

Dan's first two choices are Danielle and Kara, giving him an estrogen-fueled team. As the gym class-style of picking teams winds down, Joe and Jodi (the two oldest players) are left. Jani picks Joe, leaving Dan with Jodi.

TEAM JANIE: Wil, Ashley, & Joe
TEAM DAN: Kara, Danielle, and Jodi

TEAM BOOGIE: Frank, Ian, and Jenn
TEAM BRIT BRIT: JoJo, Shane, and Willie
 After teams have been picked, they must compete in a race where players leap across three different moving beds to grab a teddy bear, make their way back across the beds and place their bear on top of their shelf. When all three team members have their bear, one of the players must leap back to the bear station to turn off their night light. The first team to do so wins the competition!

Julie throws a wrench into the fun saying that the captain of the winning team gets to pick Head of Household (HOH) while the captain of the losing team has to pick one of their players to GO HOME.

After a long and stressful bed bouncing competition, Brit Brit's team is the first to win. (Yayyyy!) She chooses Willie as HOH because she does know he has a target on his back by being related to Russell. Dan's team is the last team to make it across, so he is given the tough task of choosing to evict someone. Based on how well Danielle and Kara get along (and based on Jodi's terrible, terrible *yet very funny to watch* performance in the competition), he chooses to evict Jodi.

After Jodi is sent packing, the other house guests have time to mingle and get to know each other.
Ian is a total creep and when he's alone, he pretends to be a mouse and crawl under the furniture, spanks himself with his key, and just really bothers me.

Now... while a normal season of Big Brother would have the HOH choosing two players to be put up for eviction right about now, this year's Coaches twist brings another weekly competition into the mix... "The Coach's Competition" where the four coaches compete for the opportunity to protect one of their players from evicition that week.

I wouldn't mind riding Dan around a lubed up track... too far?
This week's coach's competition is Derby themed - sending the four coaches around a lubed up track in horse suits. Whoever keeps their tail on longest wins. It comes down to Queen Janie and Booger, and of course Booger wins because, well... why wouldn't he? This is Big Brother - the show that likes to give me heart attacks and permanent anxiety. Booger chooses Ian to be safe since he has such a huge target on his back from being Creep Master 2012.

Because his captain (Britney) has a coach's alliance with Janelle, Willie places Kara and Frank on the block (one teammate from Dan's team, one from Boogie's). 

HOWEVER - Willie and Frank had spoke earlier and Willie promised him safety, so trouble is already brewing in the BB house. And we love it.


Players are picked for the first Power of Veto (POV) competition, and after a soap-drenched struggle, Shane wins. He chooses to NOT use the veto to save Kara or Frank, so nominations remain the same.

Brit Brit is a tad on the paranoid side this season, so she assumes Janelle is playing her and doesn't really want to be in an alliance... which breaks their coach's alliance up. Also, rumors get out that halfway through the season, the coaches will enter the game as players, so now the new house guests don't trust their coaches anymore.

All of this leads to a HUGE Frank/Willie blow-out in the backyard.





Willie has quite the attitude, and while we hate him for it, it does make for quality entertainment. So we'll keep him around for a little, we suppose...

It's voting time and Kara gets evicted from the Big Brother house. Kara, you boring Playboy bunny - you were cute, but next time (if there is a next time), step that game up, girlfriend.


With Kara gone, Dan only has one player (Danielle) on his team, which could make her a HUGE target. Let's see how this week goes...

At the end of week one, the remaining house guests compete in a memory challenge. Earlier this week, the houseguests were shown videos of a "burglar" breaking in the BB house and messing with different household items. All questions in this True or False competition deal with videos they were shown, and when players get them wrong, they are out of the competition.

Frank wins HOH, and I could not be happier! If it doesn't do anything for game play, his HOH reign will surely do something for DRAMAAAAAAA! The close of the episode shows the house guests congratulating Frank on his win... except for Willie, who is storming inside like the buzz cut baby he is.

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